Forevermore.

The people who I’ve met personally may know that I come from a separated family. The reason I went to Singapore was because my parents didn’t wait to grow old with each other and see if they had their happily ever after. Halfway through the story, they decided to both go on another adventure but this time, without each other. For years, I took turns to hate them and blame it on them why our family got broken and how it’s not good for neither both of them or my sisters. But as time went by, I pretended not to care anymore. I woke up and got used to the fact that they weren’t living under the same roof. I may have been an ordinary girl to others. But underneath all the skin, are overwhelming feelings that I barely know how to contain. I’ve considered ways to die, but soon after realized there’s nothing that comes good with it except that I won’t be able to feel things anymore. It wasn’t until a few days ago, that I finally pushed away all these feelings and understood everything in the perspective of a young adult.

My mom and dad separated, but that affected us not only in negative ways but also positive ways such as my mom being able to work and realize how amazing she really is. I’m proud of her. She’s been strong through the years and is still growing into a wonderful woman. My mom had me when she was only 19 years old, so she never really got to have the normal adult life of partying and making mistakes. Right after graduating college, she dedicated her life into making my sisters’ life & mine amazing. She was a full-time mother & housewife. Thus, the separation did her good because she worked her butt off to be able to provide for us. Not that my father wasn’t able to provide for us but they provided us different things. And life was good. Still is. I'm just waiting for the day when my mom graduates MBA, and goes on with her dream of becoming a lawyer, knowing her, Law's just gonna be a piece o' cake.

For 12 years, she was my driver, make up artist, hair stylist, photographer, fashion consultant and mama. For the next 4 years, she was all that, but she has now upgraded to being my best friend, protector, love guru, make up guru, whatever guru you could also think of. She's like the sister I never had. Just better.

One thing for sure, is that my dad loves me. A LOT. My mom always reminded me of how I’m the favorite daughter and I know that myself, because anything I ask from my dad, I eventually get. But for the past 4 years, my dad and I grew apart from each other. Up to the point where I felt as if we were just relatives who occasionally meet and awkwardly reminisce of the good old days. But at least this year, we don’t just make small talk. We go out every now and then and play either bowling, skating or just go shopping. My only regret is that I never told my dad how he was a superhero to me. Even though he wasn’t as strong, or as handsome as Superman. He was much more than Superman and Batman combined. He was SuperPapa, the greatest papa in the world. Still is. I never did get to tell him that, or how much I love him. But one day, I hope I gather up the courage to tell him he’s not just my ATM machine or driver. He’s my papa, and I will forever be thankful for that.

See?

On the celebration of my 16th year, my mama and papa were in the same room and were kind of communicating once again, that's why I just burst out crying because they have put aside whatever problems they had to make my day memorable. This is probably one of my favorite days in my whole life. My friends were all very emotional too :p

I have learnt to treasure them both in their own ways, but as I said, it wasn’t until mm, yesterday? That I really understood their love. There’s no doubt my parents are soulmates. I’m proof. But sometimes, rarely, soulmates don’t have their happy endings intertwined. I’m still wishing that someday, their paths will cross and then it will stay together until the end of forever. But right now, that’s not the case. BUT! Even though my dad’s vows were not as sweet as my mom’s on their wedding day ( I WAS THE MAID OF HONOR BUT DIDN’T UNDERSTAND ANYTHING & JUST KNOWS ALL THESE THINGS THROUGH MY MOM’S STORIES), they both said I do, and I believe that’s true. Forevermore. I refuse to believe what others tell me. Because I’m their creation, I’ve known and understood them my whole life. I understand how my papa doesn’t like to talk about my mom because of the guilt he feels and how his heart flutters everytime he hears her name. I understand how my mama pretends to have moved on and yet when we talk about my dad her eyes sparkle as if she sees him. And I know this is true love. I’ve heard enough stories and even witnessed some of it myself. I know how they met, how my mom knew the moment she fell in love with my dad. I know how my dad got good at dodgeball because my mom would always throw things at him when they’re fighting. And most of all, I know that even though I can be the biggest bitch to both of them, that they’ll both still love me as much as the day they first saw me. And that’s the only connection I can ever ask for them. Despite the clothes, the food, the money and every other thing they give me. What’s most important is the love and care they constantly give me. I don’t really care about the gadgets or latest fashion. I just care about them caring about me. I’m just grateful to have them both in my life. So Mama & Papa, if you ever come across this blog, and think that I’m out of my mind for thinking both of you still love each other. Just suck it up. Because I’m your daughter, I have both of your genes and somehow, I can feel what you feel, And that no matter what happens to me after today, I will owe everything to you guys. Since, you guys are the reason for my existence. I can be a spoilt couch potato brat. But please, don’t ever forget that I will always be that little girl, who was ecstatic to be stuck in traffic with you guys on the day of my Holy Communion. I will always be Aiel, your first daughter. And every achievement I get, even little things such as being in 3^rd place for my school’s annual road run is for you guys. I will always try to make you proud until the day I die. I love you both forever and always. & Thank you for both my sisters too. I may be a bad example most of the time, but I love them a lot too.

And so other readers, I know I got a little sentimental but this is my blog anyway! Hehe Moral of the story, love your parents. Because they’re the only ones you will ever get. They may sometimes be old school, but they were cool during those days. I think. Til' next time xx